Wishlist

This,





*dreamy eyes*
Sounds promising,


i've tried the turnaround overnight, and i loveee it


*sigh*, i should stop experimenting on myself

Okay, you're a girl, we got it, moving on,,


I'm hungry, my sweet tooth demands deserts, but she's not getting any. I've been wandering all day, from stalking facebook profiles, window shopping on sephora online, sorting my emails, looking into the mirror, doing laundry, brushing my hair, refreshing twitter, frying burgers, picking carrots off my nasi goreng, updating blogpost, to staring blankly at my downloads, just anything,

instead of studying.



I should go now,


I still have carrots to pick

But everything is gonna be fine

Hi peeps!


How was your day? Mine was ok, got class and stuffs. It feels good to be back on the net again. My broadband is giving me a hard time these few days, as if punching a big hole on my wallet monthly as it is wasn't enough. He had to double that this time, when i'm really trying to save up. Yes, i'm naming him Bad, cause he is such a bad ass. And mobinil has a very,,very,,very, bad customer service. If it happens again, i'm never gonna feed u any topup again, and yes, i'm looking at u Bad.


On top of that, I wasn't feeling very well these days. Sore throat, runny nose and stuffs. It kinda sucks, plus the lack of internet, but after today's tazkirah, it felt bearable. Wish to get better soon. Paediatrics is almost over, and i haven't really gotten the hang of it. I haven't even give out any of the sweets that i got for the kids. Cause most of our cases were babies, they don't even have enough teeth yet. Plus, i don't think the mother would be happy if we gave their kids sweets, i know i wouldn't.


In short, i'm not happy :( but everything should get better soon right? Rightt?

Sigh, i did my presentation badly today. Sorry guys. I was too nervous, the podium was very tall, i don't think people can see me. Gosh! why did i get so nervous about.



but i got costa today, thanx Ella n Jaja, u guys are awesome.

Exams is a lot of stress :(

:'(

Baby serai n the gang

Yay, i've started keeping plant nowadays. I've always wanted a pet, but i figured a cat was too much of a resposiblity, i don't wanna end up killing them. So, i took up some serai halia lengkuas kunyit n chilies from back home to plant them here. The search for soil to grow them on was a long story, lets just say they weren't easy to come by.





After all, there they are underground, can't wait for them to grow up, up up!






and yeah, i should be studying now. U can't imagine how unprepared i am,bye!

Can i ask u something?

I was wondering,


you know,


sometimes,


during the days, that your hormones just don't agree with each other,


you get cranky, very irritable, so you made bad calls.Very, verry,, bad ones

Is it your doing or it was the hormones all along?

*************************

If it was the hormones, i would totally regret them, and if it was me, i would most definitely hate myself. Either way, i lose.

How about you?

Rendang

Ketupat

Lemang

Lontong

Soto

Kuah kacang + ayam

Nasi lemak

Nasi minyak

Ayam + daging masak merah


*are all my "raya must have" foods

but sadly, not this raya. sigh. I miss mum n dad n along n adik n wafiq. I just had a bad day, no, i'm not going to whine in details. I'm just, tired. disconnected.

Depression,


How do i make it go away?

T_T

It’s another mood swing, bear with me people. For no reasons i’m so mad at everything, so sad at nothing. Maybe because of i did histo badly, maybe i haven’t cried enough on my last breakups, maybe because Paraguay lost to Spain(but hey, i’m cheering for Spain) or maybe, i’m just hungry. I’m confused, my heart is speaking out loudly, but my mind tells me otherwise. I know very well where this is bringing me, but my brain won’t let me go. I shouldn’t, he’s a quicksand, i’ll fall deep if i step in. O my God, please give me peace.

I should get busy, dress up, or,, get a new crush? an impossible new crush, go crazy shopping, draining my accounts,, spoil my taste buds with good food, but that will make me fat, and single, but studying is not even an option here,, DON’T U EVEN THINK OF SUGGESTING..maybe i should go starve, fasting for a change.. I won’t listen to songs, they are all just bitter, all the ones that go famous are telling sad tales..ok, that’s just my playlist..My eyes won’t sleep, but if i did, can i have beautiful dream? It’s ok to dream of fairytales kan?

After all, thanks Ella,,Jaja,, for walking me through these days,

Crazy football days,

We are cheering for Spain, really..

That's what i wrote, before i realise i lost my Parasitology text book. I think it says Nur Hidayah Rushadi somewhere, so if you happened to found it, let me know k..May have slipped it at Mcd..I've got final tomorrow, now that's a concreate reason to cry for..

2nd July

Its July now, and its also a friday. There is no library on friday, so i can't seems to set my mind on histo. Keeps going in and out of twitter. Bored, really.



Heart, u really needs u shut up now. I'm letting mind takes the upper hand.
Now go and digest histo!

Please don't die

Its a loooonng day..Hp is dying.. Even a CPR practitioner won't help.. I'm sad.. Totally..

Nak buat tag

I'm doing this tag, from Haha, sebab,,,sebab,,sebab..... sebab nak buat la!

Appearance:
156cm x 42kg numerically
yellow or should i say brown in colour?
wide eyes, thick eyebrows,


Family/Home Life:
2nd daughter of 3 sisters

Embarrassment
I'm the queen of embarrassing moments..
I ask for extra cup of ice with my drinks, always!
I love to chew bits of ice and make crunchy noise, to tell you the truth, sometimes i buy drinks just for the ice,and yeah, its a bad habit..
I try to withdraw seringgit 2 posen, when my balance is only seringgit seposen (my balance are in RM, when i'm supposed to withdraw LE, how would i know? and what's wrong with try and error?
I make displays at shops fall down the ground right after touching or passing by them, then i made my date collect them and put them back, or maybe the salesperson(sorry)
I copied pictures from the net without considering copyright, and i ended up being announced a theft through my own blog
I speaks loud Malays
I told my friend this cute guy in Malay, when he is just right next to us without knowing his nationality first
I have weird gestures when panicked
I love to ask the waiter to descibe their food before ordering and sometimes ask for recommendations

Ok, this is going on and on,,better stop now.. Some things i did, i didn't think they are embarrassing, but others did, and its sad that they, being among the closest, who is supposed to love me despite the ugly side of me, do think that i, am embarrassing.. If i'm that embarrasing why did u asked me out in the first place?

Health:
Am healthy..
but i do have doubts for vagus nerve paralysis, but i'm too scared to point it out, time tengah belajar pasal ni dulu..


Travelling:
Been to
Malaysia
Egypt
Turkey

Experiences:
I don't know, should have specified

Relationships :
Been in three
First was a big fat liar, he is not even handsome to juggle two girls at one time, or maybe more? I would never know. Silly. I've never really liked him
Second was quite a catch, he was one of the nicest boys i've ever know.. He liked me eversince form 2 kot, or is it form 1.. Very persistent, but i never took him as a lover, eventhough we tried, i didn't think it worked out for me.. I see he moved on now, good for him.. She's lucky, he wont hurt a fly..
Third was this guy that i like, but of course he likes me first.. He keeps on hurting me from time to time, but he always got another chance.. I guess its like the first time you gave your heart out, to someone who can actually hurt you, even with the smallest expression.. It got ugly if you gave it to an unworthy..

Sexuality:
Tak faham, i'm a girl if thats the question

Honesty/Crime:
We don't admit our crimes. Don't we?

Drugs/Alcohol:
Alcohol-no
Drugs-when i have to, to maintain health of course. Never recreationally..


That all, nak tag Ella ngan Sadis(tak tau die buat tag ke tak) la..

I'm sory, my badd

I feel bad.. About yesterday.. If you know what i mean.. Sports was never my kind of thing.. Lets hear a story.. Remember BTN? We have this physical test, where you get points for timing and everything.. Then you sum it all up, and there is this formula, which puts you into categories of stamina and expected age, according to the points.. They figured i was 50+ years old.. I'm that bad..


So you don't want me in.. All those crap about marathon lepak-lepak is nothing, believe me, i know better.. I've been in MRSM, one second she's are promising to walk together through UKJK next second, she is running on the 4th round and saying hello to my 2nd round drunken gait.. It would be a bother to wait for me to finish.. I'm a super turtle, no, not turtle ape tu, kura-kura in english?

So why not tennis? Its too heavy, and i sucks anyway..

So the point is, i'm sorry..

Maybe i'll stand by and take pictures? you like pictures don't you? or maybe i'll just stay home.. sleeping..

This morning is all awkward.,haih.. You spend years building a trust, then one day you just happens to be in a bad mood, and thats it, you blew it all off..


Mm,, its all gloomy.. Mom is haven't smsed me yet today.. Adik just called, she's just never been out of credits.. I'm worried, is high school ok for her.. Sad, not having a big sister by hand-reach to consult.. Have to make an international call for opinions.. If only i can teach her chemistry through the fon, she'll score better than D.. Its ok sis, transition is hard to catch up with..


I'm in a major self-destruction right now, i can't stop eating.. No matter how much i fought it, i'll end up stuffing myself with the not so delicious food.. If it is heavenly tasty i wouldn't be so mad at myself.. If i got fat or chubby, i'll end up very late in class, as i'll be changing outfits 2-3 times while asking "nampak gemok x?" over and over again.. Which is extremely annoying..


currently craving for birthday cakes, ouh, birthday, come quick, i'm almost crazy from anticipating and preparing, and its not even mine..




Ok, have to stop now. Kena pegi masak, its a wednesday everyone!

Its march again!

Hi there,

Its been a while since my last post. A lot did happens, so many, that i can't figure how to update. I forgot how to blog. huhu..


Its march.. School is on, everything is finally moving again. Crazy month of confusion and stress. Flight tickets, birthdays, school, exams, laundry, pimples, and everything to deal with..

Now, i've lost my words. Blank. I'll get to you later..

;'(

Why is it so hard for me, to know what i want..

I'll end up losing them..

not happy anymore.. i'll be holding on to my phone, in case..

A day on Dreamland

Yesterday, we went on a trip, to Dreamland.. Thank you, for letting us to tag along.. That Dreamland holds a bounch of memories, of my first year cairo trip, not long ago.. Somehow, i wanted to redo it again, it was fun back then, but i wanted to do it differently..


It was there that i got my teddy-ixus, and its also, where syamim lost his canon-ixus.. I guess that explains the teddy's name.. I was so messy on the head these few days, so i wish, i could clear it up, and sort things out.. somewhere fun, colourful, and dreamy.. Eventhough i wasn't in the best condition for outdoors activity, i dragged jaja along.. Thanx jaja, for keeping me company..


So, it begins with a 3 hours coaster ride.. I'm proud to say "saya tak tido the whole way up to dreamland" .. It was smooth, no wonder orang laen tido.. haha..Ok, thats not even funny.. Tapi the whole way, pak cik driver play this annoying songs.. huhu.. It was a pain in the ear-drum, but i enjoyed the scenery.. Egypt is not that bad anyway..



Guess what, our first ride was, this thing, that i didn't went on last year.. It was so scary.. I won't do it again.. Jaja was thinking right, for not taking this one..





see, how high up we went!

Extreme ride, with an empty stomach, ends me up excruciatingly dizzy, and nauseated.. I thought i was ok, then a took another spinny ride, and that was all.. I puked.. Then, Halim handed some anti-motion sickness pills, and i was better.. Thank you..


As a part of recovery, i didn't went on this one.. I took some pictures for them.. See!




Cip pon tak naek yang ni, sebab kami pening, we just sat by their bags, watching they went up..






It was fun, eventhough kami tak try out everything.. It feels good to just be there.. Some place i would want to be on my birtday.. but, there was no swing, maybe there was, but i haven't seen one.. I love swings..




Pastu, naek horse.. If i was to choose the best ride on the trip, it was this one.. Tapi takut, sebab sangat tinggi and rase tak stable, macam bole jatuh bile-bile mase, but having a view on top of the horse, of friends, there for you, kinda swipes the fear away..It was cool, and sakit jugak, kan jaja?huhu


Me, on a horse ride..gamba tak clear sebab amik screen shot.. Thanks for the video, and few photos..


Jaja, getting friendly with the dream horse


Lepas tu naek train comel, pusing-pusing..


Tu last kot, lepas tu tros keluar cari kfc.. Da kenyang, acara tido gaya bebas dalam coaster.. 3 jam lagi sampai rumah..

Entry ni macam banyak gamba, tapi bosan kan, ntah la..tapi saye gembira..

Adik is comforting, kinda funny when its usually my role, to comfort her..

Sedih kan bile kite belajar far away, from our parent.

Sedih kan bile kite tak bole jawab exam.

Sedih kan bile kite dapat phone calls from parent occasionally, asking pasal exam, kite just bole cakap kite tak dapat jawab exam.



I wish i did better, or maybe best.. That way i won't feel so bad..

I misses home.. I'm sure all of us did..



I talked to my dad, I said i did badly in the exam, and he was like, "its ok,,do better next time and do push yourself too hard, get a good night sleep, take care of your health".. 10 years ago, i'd probably get scolded for bad marks.. I remember getting no 3 in class, and i was even called to sit and talk by my parent.. No, he doesn't use rotan, he talks, nasihat and everything.. It does work on us..

But i guess now, i'm on my own, i'm a grown up. No one is going to tell me to study when i should, i'll just have to do what i have to do,, for my life...

So now i should go, buka buku and study patho..

Yes hidayah, you should!

Mm,, on second thought, maybe i'll take a little nap first.. I'm still kinda dizzy from the anatomy..



So, this is where i stop.. Anat sangat susah sebab saya malas.. Lupe kan anat untuk patho,(for now) sebab patho lagi hensem.. Ok Gud nite..

A crappy day of mine

Sorry, i just had a really bad day,,and a bad day deserves to be shared.. So i'll have all of you listening..

I woke up just 10 minutes before anatomy practical class, and jaja did try to wake me up, earlier, but i doesn't seems to have any memory on that part..
so, apparently i was in an REM sleep(don't bother to understand if you don't) I would just be cool if its just a practical class, (i'm always late pon)..tapi this was a revision..


I rushed,,and even ran,,but then i realized i looks silly, running..not silly kot, more to ugly..so i slowed down to walking, still pacing my way to the department..



It was quick, and it wasn't him..i preferred him to revise with..because he talked so quickly that somehow it helps me to memorize everything..don't we all prefer prof said??huhu..At the end i think i only understand/memorize 45% of the lessons..Do you think how many percents, out of what i understands(45%) will be asked in the exams?I bet not much, haihs..my bad..



Pastu ktorg baru je nk revise sndri2, pakcik lab da amik sume specimen..kt grup jaja die x amik lak..pilih kasih btol..huhu..



Then i thought i'd better join jaja revise kt grup die..but then thay all seem to be talking an alien language that i don't seems to catch up with..and that's a lame excuse for being so slow~Tga2 trying to fit in, tetibe terlanggar glove jaja lak..it was just a minute touch, and i wasn't even sure, whether or not, i did hit that part(yg pegang kadaver)..da lg2 tensen da..and no jaja, i don't blame you..It was mine all along..


Still trying to revise,but, no,,i can't put the words into sense..I finally went home..



Balik rumah,,solat,,kemas2,,ingatkan sc nk datang rmh..Pastu pegi pharma lak..



It was our presentation.. I did badly..I answered wrongly and confidently..huhu..it was a pounch in the stomach,,when the lecturer said "no,its the same" Its not my fault,,cikgu yg bg handouts pon tls cmtu kat handout die..tenet pon ckp camtu.. I wish i had defend my points, that they are based upon a strong source.. The worst part is that, i was sent away just after few slides(3 kot)..I did 19 slides kot,,and they only evaluate 3..Isn't that sad? Yeah,it is..


Then i went mcdonalds and kfc..Trying to pujuk myself with happy meal with a talking alvin(chipmunks) together with spicy chicken drumsticks.. I actually thought of costa frescato..but jaja want to go sc..and the other one, doesn't wanna go.. It was a shame just to ask..when u get a NO for an answer, it'll just sends you crying to mcd and then kfc..



so, bottom line--> sape2 nak wat revision anat lagi, can i come with?

Common,,is common...

Huhu,,

Got down by common cold (i think it is), whateever, i'm not a doctor yet pon.. I don't mind fever, or cold, because i rarely have them..
Last year cam x demam pon..
Just not during the exams, huhu.. Now, i can't really focus.. Everytime feels like bedtime, huhu.. Its just a common cold je pon.. Tapi sbb x slalu kne, da kna msti la nk memnjekn diri kan.. Tapi x bole la let go exam kn.. Haih, sedey..huhu..

So lets hit the books people!


Esok exam pkul brape ek?


semoga kite sume dapat jawab exam dengan baek..amin


+++++++++++++++++++



by the way, arini the whole faculty got showered by ashes.. The pieces u get, when u burn papers.. I wonder, did someone go crazy, bakar buku medic on top of the buildings, and spread the ashes, harap2 die x lompat..



k,,babai

Lame

Current mode : kinda lost..


not again,